Five Berenstain Bears Books We’ll Never Get To Read
With the passing of Jan Berenstain yesterday at the age of 88, the classic children’s series The Berenstain Bears seems to have come to an end. Current Ground spoke with Mrs. Berenstain before her passing, and she described five of her ideas for upcoming installments in the iconic franchise. Here are five Berenstain Bears books that we will never get the pleasure of reading.
The Berenstain Bears and Too Much Texting
The entire Berenstain clan learns a valuable lesson when Sister Bear becomes addicted to BBM and accidently sends a naked picture of herself to her whole school.
The Berenstain Bears and the Big Ugly Facebook Virus
When Brother Bear spreads a rumor about his rival on Facebook and Twitter, the story literally goes viral and begins infecting the entire town. Mother Bear must save the day with her ego-soothing noodle soup.
The Berenstain Bears Occupy Wall Street
Upset with the systemic economic injustice pervasive in the country, the Berenstain Bears decide to fly to New York in a display of solidarity with the 99%. Things take a turn for the worse, however, when Papa Bear stumbles into the south side of Zuccotti Park and accidently becomes addicted to heroin.
The Berenstain Bears and Too Much Dubstep
Brother Bear, Sister Bear, and their friends are totally psyched to get their faces melted off at the Skrillex show next week, but hilarity ensues when Mother Bear becomes panicked that nobody can find Sister Bear’s best friend, Molly.
Uncle Bear Moves In
When Uncle Bear and his male panda bear partner move in with the Berenstain Bears, the family is caught in a town crossfire as everyone takes sides on the legal and moral implications of a same-sex, intergenus partnership. Peace is finally brokered at a local church potluck as the bears agree not to be “too gay” in public.
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